Aileen (sweetdemon) wrote,

goddamn i'm so tired!

Yeah, so I can barely get myself out of bed in the mornings and than i get seroquel prescribed to me to take at night.

What does this mean: That now I can't even get myself out of bed until afternoon with barely enough time to get ready for work.

I have a crisis intervention couselor and a therapist who work together now. One that I see and one that sees me. I feel a lot better about this because I feel like I have someone or should I say someones are devoted to making sure I get better and get the hell out of Hunter. Meaning that i graduate get out of Hunter. My French teacher had a hunch something was wrong and came to the rescue. I appreciate his help a lot.

But seriously, why are people prescribed that shit, it's been two weeks and all i do is sleep more and act like a potatoe when I'm walking around. I feel like my soul has been taken over by this medication. I'm all up for medication when it helps in a positive way, but this shit sucks. I'm too sedated to do anything.

But when I can I read (meaning a page before I knock out) and so far there is this really amazing sex book it's called: she comes first.

It's freaking hott and everyone fucking girl and guy should read it and live by it.
the end.

It's been a month and I'm still not done with my essays that were due a month ago and lose a letter grade each day it's late.
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Damn. This is freaking awful. Haven't seen you or Vic in mad long. I guess this is why. Are you being prescribed Seroquel to treat insomnia or something else? Feel better.
no i don't have insomnia, more like manic depression. I read its illegal to prescribe seroquel for insomnia and sleep disorders.

We need to see you too! Everytime we watch the colbert show we think of you! doesn't it suck he got voted off the ballot!
I read that it's not technically illegal, but maybe thats in the case of manic insomniacs, not sure. I'm not one to judge what you feel or what you need, but behavior modifying medication of any sort, unless it is truly necessary (cases of harmful, suicidal, or delusional behavior), is usually not the best option. Try something else, I like meditation.
i get so bored during meditation. i feel like i'm stuck at a church sermon...

my finger hurts...

Your finger hurts? I think you might be doing it wrong.
stop medicating yourself and start living life.
are you self medicating? well putting yourself on or taking yourself off medication is still self medicating without consulting someone well.. for me. i mean i think the people you're working with are really genuine (or sound so), so i would hope they aren't careless about what medicines they use. but i think you should talk it out before any steps are taken
my mother stopped taking seroquel. but shes also self destructive without knowing it. so sedation works for that situation, besides the fact that she refuses to take anything and just wasted all this medication that some people actually take seriously and shes just some selfish bitch but.. oh thats just my tangent. but if it doesnt work, then there are other routes to take i would hope. but i think especially in my mothers case, it takes years to find out what works or what doesnt work, or what just works for now, which can be good, cause we just need something right now. i guess im just ultra sensitive to those who stop medications cause well overall its a sensitive subject. because as helpful as they can be they have awful feeling side effects which causes people to stop taking them, so its destructive when youre on it and off it. its just a constant battle for yourself and for those who care for you, but we're part of your support. sometimes when i feel like im drowning i cant breath, i count to three and take a deep breath. and then do everything i can do at the time. maybe its more like a manic episode or something.
i'm talking to the psych today to see what's really good, and if I can get something other than a tranquilizer...because it ain't workin' or maybe i haven't given it enough time. I hope they are genuine...well they aren't getting paid either so maybe they are lol. the thing that scares me the most are the side effects since it's all basically warnings. professionals and try to work out which medicines are actually helping and which aren't doing you any good. It's obviously best to cut out whatever you can to avoid nasty side effects. Balance good each drug does versus the bad, you know? Besides that it's you're own determination that's got to keep you going. To an extent drugs are the problem, but don't use medication as a scape goat.